Relate counsellor, Peter Saddington spoke to The Times about a new study which has found the female libido is bigger than it is given credit for.
The findings come as no surprise to therapists. Saddington, a counsellor and sex therapist for Relate, says that when couples come for therapy and a separate history is taken of their sexual relationship, each partner is asked the same question: if this problem can be remedied how often ideally would you like the two of you to have sex?
“Sometimes you will get a big disparity, but that’s unusual,” he says. “More often than not you will get a very similar answer.”
Saddington says that despite the messages of feminism many women, including young women, still feel culturally uncomfortable about instigating sex within a couple.
They still feel their role is to be ‘wooed’ so they keep their desires hidden.
“Men are more obvious and explicit when they are interested in being sexual,” he says. “Women aren’t always in the same way, so men don’t see the signals and misconstrue.”
If you would like to talk about sex with our sex therapist, give our friendly appointments team a call on 01234 356350.