We all love a good quiz! Especially a personality quiz, telling us things that are so true we can’t believe we hadn’t noticed yet. And that’s exactly what this family love languages quiz does…
This Family Love Languages Quiz (found on the Five Love Languages website) is a great way for a family to find out more about each other – and it’s suitable from age 8 up. Check out the five love languages below, each have a go at the quiz and then take on the challenges at the end of the article!
What are love languages?
Love languages are the different ways we experience and express love. We each prefer a different ‘language’ of love. That’s why you might feel very loved by one person, who happens to share your love language – and baffled by another, who shows you love in a completely different way.
- Physical touch: holding hands, a hug, a massage, even just simply touching someone’s arm – for some, physical contact with others makes their heart sing.
- Words of affirmation: when someone says something positive to you, whether about what you’ve done, how you look or who you are – this is the highlight of your day.
- Acts of service: perhaps it leaves you feeling fantastic when someone goes out of their way to help you, even in little ways – helping with the household chores without being asked, tidying away a mess before you’ve even thought about it or popping to the shops when the milk has run out.
- Quality time: spending focussed time over a coffee or dinner; playing a game together; going on a walk. Someone choosing to spend good time with you means you feel deeply loved.
- Gifts: it might be a bunch of daffodils, or a diamond ring; perhaps they made a card and posted it. Getting gifts is what really makes you buzz.
Love languages aren’t just about how you best feel love – they’re also the most natural way you give love too. So you can often spot someone’s love language by noticing how they show love to you!
Do the quiz
Everyone needs to do the quiz on their own. (Select the relevant age group at the start.) Secretly write down your love language results in order from most to least.
Guess the love language
Can you guess each family members’ top love language – and the one that means zilch to them?
Note down what you think for each family member and see who gets the most right!
Write down everyone’s top love language and stick it somewhere in the house, like on the fridge or a pinboard.
Most loving moment this week
See if you can each think of the moment you felt most loved this week. Does it match your love language?
What about a moment when you showed love to someone else? Does it match your love language – or theirs?
Why do love languages matter for my family?
Love languages matter because they are a key way of communicating with each other. Showing love well to each other opens up conversation and connection that would otherwise not happen.
When parents know their childrens’ love languages, they can make sure that they are loving them in a way they understand. And children – particularly teens – benefit from knowing what really helps their parents feel loved.
At Relate, we believe families really matter. Family is the primary place where children learn how to love. It is where they develop emotional literacy, that equips them for the outside world.
There are lots of ways in which family trust and closeness can be broken. It can then become very hard to show love to one another. If your family is struggling to connect with one another, especially after the pressures and complexities of lockdown, our counsellors can help you. We are still running family counselling, via Zoom or telephone. Get in touch with us today to find out more.