Half Of People In The Midlands Have A ‘Very Good’ Relationship With Their Mother

31 March 2015

Relate Bedfordshire and Luton’s tips to help relationships blossom this Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is traditionally a time to celebrate that special woman in your life, but, according to figures released this week by leading relationships charity Relate, a significant proportion of us admit that our relationship with our mum could be better.

According to a YouGov poll of over 5000 people across the UK, just over half (52%) of people living in the Midlands say they have a ‘very good’ relationship with their mum and almost a quarter (24%) describe theirs as ‘fairly good’.* Despite this largely positive picture, 14% describe their relationship with their mother as ‘average’, 4% describe it as ‘fairly bad’ and 3% describe it as ‘very bad’.**

Diane Whitmore, counsellor at Relate Bedfordshire and Luton, believes there is room for at least a little improvement in all relationships. She said: “It’s wonderful that so many people in the Midlands have a good relationship with their mum, but no matter how positively we view our relationships there are always things we can do to make them stronger. The key thing, as with all relationships, is to communicate and be able to show your mum how you’re feeling.”

Make your relationship blossom this Mother’s Day – Diane’s top tips:

  • Find time for one another: If you feel that quality time with your mum is limited, suggest building a regular phone call or skype session into your weekly routine and remember to meet up face to face when you can.
  • Keep gifts personal: Why not produce a photo collage for Mother’s Day of all your favourite memories together, or invite her round for lunch and cook her favourite meal?
  • Be true to yourself: It can be tempting to live your life the way you think your parents want you to, but be careful not to lose who you are. Your mum may encourage you to study something particular at university, for example, or to stay living nearby with your family, but is that what you want?
  • Tell her how you feel: Some people find it easier to talk about their feelings than others but when it comes to your relationship with your mum, this is the holy grail of advice.
  • Avoid placing blame:  Only you can be responsible for your own feelings.  Blaming your mum for the way you are will only result in conflict. If you find yourself getting frustrated, take a deep breath and think about how you can soften your language by using sentences starting with ‘I’ and not ‘you’.
  • Be patient: Any issues with your mother are likely to have built up over time, which means any improvement in the relationship is also likely to be gradual. Keep working at it.

Relate Bedfordshire and Luton offers information, advice and counselling for all stages of relationships, including helping families to build and maintain strong relationships. Explore this website or call 01234 356350.

For all media enquiries contact Angela Foll on 01234 400730 or angela.foll@relatebedsandluton.org.uk

*The survey of 5778 people nationwide was carried out by YouGov.  The sample size of people from the Midlands was 530 and includes the East Midlands & West Midlands was 922. Responses were gathered between 25 February and 18 March 2014. All figures, unless otherwise stated, are from YouGov Plc.
**The survey results for the UK as a whole show that 55% of people said they have a ‘very good’ relationship with their mums, 23% described their relationship as ‘fairly good’, 12% described it as ‘average’, 5% described it as ‘fairly bad’ and 2% described it as ‘very bad’.

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